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Skelton's Tips For a Lasting Marriage
by Dead serious
2. We also sleep in separate beds, hers is in California and mine is in Texas.
3. I take my wife everywhere...but she keeps finding her way back.
4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen.
5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.
7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was; she told me, "In the lake."
8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.
9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late for the garbage?" The driver said "No, jump in!"
10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was "Always".
12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.
13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"
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It’s really kind of cool when you think back over several decades of being comfortably gay (for the most part, except for the occasional polite societal acquiescence, usually borne out of contemptuous dismissal facilitating rapid dispatch of any potential issue—yeah rapid!). Over the years, I’ve gone from delightful initial experimentation and discovery, to multiple long term relationships,
Looking Back--Gay Sex Driven, Part 01
I can remember my early exploration and almost nightly summertime search for other like minded gay guys. When you’re 18 and the uppermost nightly mindset is getting your rocks off, one gets almost consumed by the thrill of the pursuit. Such was the case one early summer evening. Going to University, but still living at home, presented a host of both conveniences and the obvious privacy
Looking Back--Gay Sex Driven, Part 02
Well, that smelly night didn’t dissuade me from further exploitation—or eventually becoming a well-versed dick sucker for that matter either! Hey, you just can’t keep a hard man down, or a good man from moving on up—or something like that I guess. Well, it’s another summer night and as usually—I’ve got something important on my mind—not to be confused with impotent! Hey at 18, that damn
Looking Back—Gay Sex Driven, Part 03
Well, after Bob split for Arizona, there was only one thing for a healthy and horny 19 year old to do—keep on looking for another penile playmate. Yeah, I know it sounds kind of rude, crude and calloused I guess, but that’s just the way life was at the moment. I’d not had the luxury of having had a significant partner yet. What’s more, at that age it was my other head that was doing the
Looking Back—Gay Sex Driven, Part 04
As soon as Blake and I stepped through the first door to the back building, we felt a blast of cold air. It wasn’t like walking out into the Artic, but it sure made the titties on both our chests perk up. (You think I wouldn’t notice that?) There was a second security door, and it got even colder. “I sure hope the maid didn’t leave the A/C on full blast. I had it turned off last night; I’m
Looking Back—Gay Sex Driven, Part 05
After we’d managed to contain our laughter (we didn’t manage to contain the mess) we rolled on our sides facing each other. Blake ran his hands up and down me from my thighs to my neck, spreading even more of the mess around. It felt like some sort of therapeutic massage I guess (I guess because at that point, I’d never had a massage). Not willing to be out done, I reciprocated. We were
Looking Back—Gay Sex Driven, Part 06
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Looking Back—Gay Sex Driven, Part 07
Yeah, Blake would have been a “keeper” and for a good many weeks—maybe you could quantify it in terms of months—no other sexual conquest quite measured up—either in terms of muscle and dick size, or in terms of sheer uncanny compatibility. I certainly wasn’t giving up…but then again I wasn’t ready to settle down anyway. Blake and I were not setting up house, and we’d never discussed any
Looking Back—Gay Sex Driven, Part 08
It’s truly amazing just how easily you can get yourself tired when you put your mind to it. Actually, truth be told, after a testy day at registration and chasing books, I was ready for some sack time…and I hoped Virgil was as well…but probably for divergent reasons. I led the way upstairs to the second floor (or the first floor as mother called it—another one of her English quirks.) I
Looking Back—Gay Sex Driven, Part 09
Looking Back—Gay Sex Driven, Part 09 Morning made itself known brightly—I’d forgotten to close the blinds—and there was a rather large window directly opposite my bed that faced east. As soon as the sun hit my eyes, I was awake. If I’d had any preconceptions regarding Virgil’s sleeping habits, I was dead wrong…he was still sleeping soundly. I’d have bet money that he probably usually “woke
Lunchtime Snack, Part 1
Lunchtime Snack, Part 1 Well, it’s quite possible that you won’t believe the strange set of circumstances that came about for me. It all started about three weeks ago and quite frankly, I wouldn’t have believed the possibility of this happening myself—that is if I hadn’t been a willing participant. I usually take a quick lunch in my office, as our company’s lunch room is notorious for
Lunchtime Snack, Part 2
Lunchtime Snack, Part 2 I was kept very busy in Houston, and Thursday afternoon came quicker than I thought. As I stepped on the plane at Intercontinental Airport, I felt an anxious tingle between my legs. Things had went rather well, and on top of everything else, I’d been upgraded to first class, which meant that I’d be getting some sort of dinner as well. That was icing on the cake,
Lunchtime Snack, Part 3
We had taken off to the west and made the wide turn to the east. While the plane was banking slightly to the left…this afforded a great view of metropolitan Houston...and accordingly, Carter was busy looking out the window. Usually I prefer a window seat if all things are equal. I’ve flow a lot, but always like the view—plus you don’t have anyone crawling over you to either stand in the aisle
Lunchtime Snack, Part 4
I guess that being tired from my trip as well as being able to spend time in my own bed took its toll. I slept right through until a splash of sunlight hit me in the face. I was momentarily startled and quickly leaned over to check the time. 7:30 AM. I usually would already be at the office by now. I bolted from the bed and hit the showers. I threw back my pills and chased them with a half
Lunchtime Snack, Part 5
Lunchtime Snack, Part 5 Well now, I’ve just gotta tell ya…after my long hiatus from sex, not entirely voluntary on my part, I was very pleased at the ease which the two of us “fit”. I guess it’s really true what ‘they say’ that sex is like riding a bicycle—one never forgets. Thank God—my equipment responded splendidly. I didn’t have to ask Rodrigo if “it was good for him” and judging from
Lunchtime Snack, Part 6
Lunchtime Snack, Part 6 Sunlight shown through the verticals and hit me in the face. I quietly untangled myself from my bench-mate who was sleeping soundly. I peered over Rodrigo’s head and glanced at the digital clock on the nightstand—7:45 am. I was worn out, but not really tired. It’s really kind of odd how you can trick your body if you don’t recall what time you made it to sleep! I
Lunchtime Snack, Part 7
Now I guess there are really not too many guys who would be sympathetic to my carping about overdoing it—that is performing “the beast with two backs” on a marathon level. And truth be told, I was having the time of my life—even though I was beginning to be concerned about my continued performance level. Damn Rodrigo had a libido that would rival any species of monkey—or any oversexed biped
Lunchtime Snack, Part 8
Carter met me just as I walked into the hotel lobby. From a distance he looked quite different than I’d remembered from our flight home from Texas. Actually—he looked better somehow—maybe it was the huge smile that he eagerly flashed.--so upbeat and genuine. My fatigue and any possibly guilty feelings I might have had with regard to Rodrigo vanished—I guessed I was getting my second wind.
Lunchtime Snack, Part 9
“Hey, I don’t know about you, but I’m starving!” Rodrigo declared. “How about we go to that all you can eat Chinese Buffet?” I was still getting my bearings and not dwelling on what was being suggested. All I really heard was the part about the Chinese Buffet. Then I realized I’d not had anything but coffee at the office, and decided it sounded pretty good. “Okay, what time can you break
Lunchtime Snack, Part10
I swear, I’d just gotten my eyes shut—really. As I emerged from my semi-comatose state to answer the phone, I realized that there was bright sunlight filtering through the verticals on my window. I retrieved the receiver, and immediately the dammed ringing stopped. “Hello! Chris, you all right?” came the response from the other end of the cradle. “Yeah, of course I am.” I replied not
Lunchtime Snack, Part11
As I sat their on the toilet trying to get my dick to cooperate and let me pee, my thoughts were confused and became more muddled trying to consider all the possibilities. I only had a one bedroom apartment…not that that was a problem as far as the sleeping arrangements, but what about Carter’s stuff? Maybe he had more than just a car load of stuff…he’d not talked about furniture, etc. Maybe
Skelton's Tips For a Lasting Marriage
1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesday's, I go on Friday's. 2. We also sleep in separate beds, hers is in California and mine is in Texas. 3. I take my wife everywhere...but she keeps finding her way back. 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long
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